This blog is a compilation of my random, often paranoid, cynical and even delusional thinking. This is a little bit of insight into my brain. It is frightening even to me, and I live here.... Or it could be about tomatoes....
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
The Dentist Part 2
I sat down in the chair, feeling rather positive about my decisions and put on my headphones and turned up my ipod. She put a little nose piece in my nose and I breathed deeply. This sort of worked for a little awhile but then I got a little anxious and asked her to turn it up. Then I asked her to turn it up again. I started to feel claustrophobic, then lightheaded, then nauseous, then a little violent and just before I passed out I ripped the mask off my nose. That was it for the laughing gas. I survived the filling but I'm pretty sure she cracked that tooth. I can't seem to win.
Later in the week I was talking to my Mom and relating this story. She told me of her experience with a rural Canadian dentist and nitrous oxide. She beat him up she got so violent on it. Apparently it's hereditary, some people just can't deal with laughing gas.
Friday, March 27, 2009
Another Saga Begins - The Dentist
How did this fear of dentists start I wonder? When I was young I remember going to the dentist and I had something like 10 cavities. I think I was around 6 or so. I vividly recall sitting in the dental chair crying very loudly and my mom having to leave me there and run home to get more money. I don't know if I had permanent teeth or baby teeth. What dentist fills cavities in baby teeth? What dentist makes the Mom leave their kid screaming in the chair? Sadistic bastard. I'm sure no one likes going to the dentist but for me it's definitely a fear laden experience. I lay in that chair and my back is rigid and my neck is so tight you could play a tune on my tendons.
So I tried a new dentist that was recommended by a friend. She told me that this dentist had a very Zen attitude. Zen is good. Zen is calm. I like Zen. The dentist can be found here. My first appointment wasn't bad at all except the inevitable news that more work was needed. The most interesting part of the appointment was the new technology. She put a small pen camera in my mouth and took live pictures of the teeth and then they only x-rayed what was needed instead of shoving tons of those hard plastic painful film pieces into your mouth. And yes, I did have a heated, lavender scented neck pillow to soothe me.
Since that first experience I've been back for preparation for a root canal and a crown. I'm sure step 2 of many, many steps. The experience was preceded by some drugs on my part, very necessary, Bose noise cancelling headphones, my ipod, a lavender scented neck pillow and a very kind, patient dentist. I'm none the worse for wear. I now have an appointment with the endodontist for the root canal. I'm hoping he's a nice, gentle and cute as my Dr. Shafi.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
The First Purchase
Oh, and as a point of reference in case you ever need to know. If you ship/transport any refrigeration unit on it's side you must leave it upright for 48 hours prior to plugging it in to power. This is so the freon will settle. This is apparently vital. Good to know.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
And it begins
Now it begins in earnest. Do we really need the top of the line fridge? How can we cut corners here and there and everywhere? Price shopping on the internet. Reading product reviews. It's all very exhausting. Some people say "it's the journey...", enjoy the ride. I'm not sure I'm going to enjoy the ride but I'm sure I'll enjoy it once we are there. Can I just click my heels 3 times and have it be the end of 2009? Perhaps the economy would be better, my kitchen would be done and all of life would be wine and roses? Right?
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
David Copperfield
As excited as I was to see the master of magic I walked away a little disappointed. He seemed bored throughout most of the performance, just going through the motions. He also seemed quite cynical, almost defending himself to the new talent in town, the Criss Angel's of the world. Even his pre-show curtain candy seemed defensive. It was a listing of all his accomplishments, touting them to the world, as if he felt threatened we would forget. Perhaps David, it is time to hang up the wand and top hat. Just like Dan Marino and Brett Favre, sometimes it's best to retire on a high note before you're old, washed up and cynical.
As for the rest of the weekend, it was a blast. I did a ride-a-long at the Las Vegas Speedway in a Nascar where we did the 1.5 mile oval at 165 mph. Fast, unbelievably fast! I played craps for the first time in years. Most of it came back to me after about 30 minutes without the help of the sarcastic stick man. I'm proud to say I came out of Vegas $55 ahead....
Saturday, March 14, 2009
30th Reunion
I put that in there because my Mom reads my blog....
Not that my Mom is a prude or anything but it's important to cover your butt. She's still my Mom.
Tonight I attended Dena's 30th Fairfax High School reunion. She asked me to go. I swore after the 20th I'd never go again. Dena gets what she wants so I went for moral support and frankly, so she could show me off. What can I say....
Friday, March 13, 2009
Habit Forming
I received a couple gift cards for my birthday. $ 50 each at 2 different stores. I've been in each store twice now and I cannot spend them. The $ 50 isn't enough to get what I want and what I want I'm not sure I really need. I'd have to put some of my own cash into buying it and I don't really need it so I'm having a lot of trouble committing. Isn't that odd?
I think once you get in a habit of considering your purchases a little closer and holding your money closer to your vest it gets a little more difficult to part with it. I wonder if that's why people who are really cheap get that way? They've developed a habit that becomes harder and harder to break, so much so that you can't stand being with them because they won't spend a nickel. I can't imagine ever getting that way, but you never know.....
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Monday, March 09, 2009
Some Assembly Required
Saturday, March 07, 2009
Almost a Year
That one mistake I made was when I changed jobs (a brilliant move by the way) I didn't take any time off to regroup mentally and to change my physical situation at home. Let me explain; I have a home office. It's rather large. Dena has a tiny space in the corner and the rest is mine. It was that way because I spent 12 years working out of it. It's full of stuff. Manuals, books, files and the entire life that was Mitel before I switched jobs.
To give myself a break regarding this misstep, I wasn't mentally ready to clean up my old Mitel life or rather to let it go. I also wasn't mentally prepared for the new job and the drastic change that it would mean. Going from working out of the house for 12 years to reporting to an office everyday is a pretty big change. Don't get me wrong, I'm thriving on the change and am happier for it but it is a big change.
So, while in hindsight I wish I had taken a week or two to discard the old Mitel life there is no way at that time I was ready to it. Now, almost a year after leaving Mitel, I am ready. Now the problem is finding the time to clean up the office at home. I suppose that it will have to be done, little by little, similar to how personal realization and insight strikes me. Little by little I figure myself out.
Another thought is "does having a clean office, files, bookcases or whatever make you a happy person?" Does a clean garage bring happiness and emotional well being? Does discarding the old and minimizing bring calm? I think that answer depends on the person. Some people think that yes, this one thing will make it all better for me but it never does. Some people need everything in it's place to feel comfortable and some do not. Frankly, happiness is all a mind set. If we could just quiet our minds and live in the moment all the ancillary "noise" caused by our excess stuff wouldn't matter. Of course, if we could have quieted our mind to begin with we probably wouldn't have excess stuff. Something to think about.
Thursday, March 05, 2009
Thoughts
I wanted to apologize for not blogging much lately. It seems I have nothing to say. I'm tired of talking about the economy and the tail spin that this country seems to be in. I don't want to talk about my problems with my neighbor. We haven't started construction yet on our new kitchen so nothing to talk about there. We aren't moving at this moment in time, so that's not interesting.
I get up every morning and just focus on putting one foot in front of the other. I work hard, try to eat right, try to get some exercise in, and find myself wishing each day that 2009 would be over. What a terrible thing, to wish your life away. I have always tried to live by the belief that life is all about the experience and the memories those experiences create or as is often said, the journey, not the destination. But the last couple weeks I just want to get to the end. Not the end of my life but this little chapter. I want to hit the DVD chapter skip button on the remote control for my life and move on.
I want to know if all these things Obama is doing will work. I want to know if the next 5 years will be the next Great Depression or if there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I want to know if my neighbor will move or if I'll get a fence and if I do, will it all work out. I want to know if the granite we choose for the countertop will look good with the tile when it's all done. I want to know how it will all turn out and I want to know now. Perhaps I should have been a psychic? Is there a class for that? Now where did I put my crystal ball?