Tuesday, May 17, 2005

There's no Aloha in Los Angeles

"Aloha" is more than a word of greeting or farewell or a salutation. "Aloha" means mutual regard and affection and extends warmth through caring with no obligation in return. There is NO ALOHA in Los Angeles, believe me! I notice this because I've spent a lot of time in the great state of Hawaii over the past decade and have had the pleasure of visiting there probably 5 weeks in the last 2 years. What a fortunate person I am.

Did you know that Aloha is a law in Hawaii? It should be law in every state of the union. Road rage is an ever increasing scourge in Southern California & who can blame us? I used to spend 4 - 5 hours a day on the freeway commuting from my home to my job and back. This was 10 years ago. I remember once sitting at the 10/57 interchange pounding my fist against the steering wheel in frustration and screaming. And even though some of you would beg to differ, I am not that different than your average SoCal commuter.

The latest April 2005 census shows that in a ranking of large cities (with populations of 250,000 or more) the average commute time was; New York (38.3 minutes), Chicago (33.2 minutes), Newark, N.J. (31.5 minutes), Riverside, Calif. (31.2 minutes), Philadelphia (29.4 minutes), and Los Angeles (29.0 minutes). Kay, first of all, this is bullshit. Maybe if they survey someone living in West LA that's driving to work in Santa Monica, but come on, how many of those people are there? What about some poor schmuck living in Pomona driving to downtown LA everyday. He's doing about 90 minutes each way. These stupid survey's are all skewed. You can read the article here.

This is the law in Los Angeles:

  1. Don't signal cause we'll just speed up 'cause we sure as hell aren't going to let you in.
  2. If you're going to drive in the carpool lane, you'd better be doing over 70 mph or we're gonna run your ass over.
  3. Go with the flow of traffic, if traffic is doing 20 mph, don't be an ass & do 5 mph, if its doing 80 mph you'd better be in the slow lane or we'll run up your butt.
  4. Know where you're going. If you realize you are in the wrong lane and you're offramps coming, tough shit. No one is going to let you in. Maybe we would if you didn't signal...
  5. Driving with headlights on during the day because you don't have running lights indicates fear. You will be taken advantage of.
  6. The speed limit on the toll road is 80 to 90, you're paying to go fast. If you're driving <>

Well, there are lots more rules.......send me some comments with your California "rules"

1 comment:

Jillie said...

Left-Turn Olympics

In this event, the object is to be the fifth car in line to make that left turn AFTER the signal has turned red.

Personal best: #4